"...to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion--to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor."
Isaiah 61:2b-3

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Friday, June 11, 2010

Reaching for nothing??

Frantically grasping the air for something that is not there. I am searching for that one thing to hold me up as I fall helplessly off this cliff. This cliff of uncertainty. This cliff of grief.

I have no idea what's at the bottom. Sharp, deadly rocks? A raging river? Or maybe by some miracle there are soft arms to catch me and set me gently down. Are You not the God of miracles?

As I lose my footing in life, and I'm falling, it's all I can do to reach out for the hands that catch me. Can I really trust them? Will they really hold me safe from harm?

I can't stand this out-of-control feeling. I need something to hold on to.

...But wait, I can feel Your arms. Gently lifting me. Gently around me in an embrace only a father can give.

The pain does not go away, but for a brief instant I can focus on Your love. Such a warm feeling in my heart. I want this, I really do. Your love really is enough.

You understand the pain, the helplessness and you reach out to me and say, "I am here. Give it all to me. I can handle it."

I have found my foothold. My hands have grasped something strong. Something that lasts forever.

In this life I will have trouble, but You have overcome the world. I need not fear it. You are more powerful than any pain this world can inflict on me.

Does this loving feeling have to end? Can it last forever? Yes, You are forever. And I am forever Yours. I am held in Your embrace for all time. Heal this hurt, heal my heart. My Father, my Healer, my Savior, my Lord. Who are You? You are everything to me, everything that this world can never be.

Everyday You are the same. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, forevermore. Thank You, Lord. Thank You, Lord. My life is in You.

1 comment:

  1. This is beautiful, Mel. Keep writing and holding on to Him. I love you and am still praying!