Wow. it's been way too long since I posted. It's been my tough season. But you know, I've done better this year than I have in the past. I'm learning to be content where God has me and to appreciate what He has given me. It doesn't mean I don't grieve over what was lost, but learning to appreciate what I have makes it easier.
Mothers day is easier now that we have our daughter. I remember before she came into the picture and Mothers day would come around. I'd be at church with my family and they'd tell me to stand up and be recognized as a mom. I would feel so awkward because not everyone knew my situation. That I had children, they just lived in Heaven not with me. Now I get to stand proud and I'm not ashamed.
I have to share a God-thing with you. But first a little history. My husband and I decided to try again this summer with the clomid. We have 4 tries for now. The day that I went to the doctor (last week Tuesday) I think God sent me an angel. I'm certain of it.
They are doing road construction between my town and the one closest to us and I had to drive through the road construction to get to my doctors office. I ended up being stuck there for like 10 minutes. But God had a plan I'm sure of it. The lady holding the stop sign came over to talk to me. We joked around a little and started talking about our families. Eventually she asked me if I had kids. So I told her that my husband and I adopted a teenage daughter last year. She was impressed that we would adopt a teenager. She then asked if we weren't able to have kids and I told her so far we haven't been able to. She then asked me if I believed in Jesus. I told her absolutely! Then she asked if I trusted her and I said yes. She reached her hand in my van, laid her hand on my belly and prayed the most heartfelt prayer I've ever heard prayed over me. It was amazing. She prayed that God would open my womb and allow us to have a baby.
Now, I can't say that this is the magic cure-all, but it made me feel good that God thought so much of me and cared so much about my situation that He would send someone to pray for me. It would be great it if works, but I know HIs will is perfect and I accept His will for my life.
I just had to share what God has done for me. He is such an awesome and loving God.
I hope that you can feel His love around you as much as I can feel HIs love. Cause He loves you so much and only wants the best for you (even when the best feels like the worst...been there, done that).
Anyway, I better go. It's late and I really should get some sleep. God bless you all and lots of love to you as well.